One of the most common questions supermodel Ashley Graham gets is: How do you stay so confident? If you're a fan, you know that this is a topic she constantly talks about. In a YouTube video, the expecting mom said, "The idea of confidence can't come from one singular thing, meaning, if I'm picking apart my body [every day], I'm, of course, not gonna become confident after doing that. If I'm describing my body in ways that are negative, or unloving, or rude, of course I'm gonna walk away from the mirror not loving myself."
But this is just a "body" example. There are ways to build confidence without focusing on your physical attributes because this is something that "oozes into the cracks of every single thing we do in life."
There are people who grew up hearing that their body isn't good enough (yeah, hi!) and Ashley can relate to that struggle, too. She said, "This is something you have to take on as a daily practice to fix...you've been programmed to believe what society, what friends, what family, and now yourself has told you who you are...you're in this adult body that feels left out, less than, not worthy, and it's gonna [trickle] into your relationships, your work, how you treat yourself—and that's not okay."
Ashley depends on her affirmations to get her through the day. Everybody's affirmations can be totally different but hers are: "I am bold. I am brilliant. I am beautiful." She suggested thinking about what kind of work you want to put into building your confidence and making it a part of your everyday routine. And if you think affirmations are corny, it's okay. Speaking about her pregnancy weight, Ashley said, "I really had to keep going back to what I kept preaching to everyone...You guys, I understand it feels like b.s. sometimes. It feels like you can't really wrap your head around loving yourself somedays."
And when those off days come, here's her advice: "I feel like it is important to give yourself some lenience and say, 'Ok, these are my parameters, I am in a funk...' and you can give yourself a limit. Just tell yourself when it's over so you know, there's a ringing alarm going off in your head." Ashley actually doesn't even do her affirmations on her "funk" days because she knew she was "probably just going to fall into it farther and [she] was gonna be mad at [herself for lying to herself]."
One last reminder from Ashley before you go about your day: "Remember that confidence looks different for everyone but we all deserve to feel good in our bodies."
Hear more tips from Ashley Graham on how to stay confident:
* This story originally appeared on Cosmo.ph. Minor edits have been made by the Preview.ph editors.
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